Love and Lust Are Equally Beautiful

When the universe came into existence, Eros was among the first to be born, which means that life and beauty came from both love and eroticism, for He is the God of both love and lust. People today act as though lust is something to be avoided and reviled, unvirtuous at best, but that's just our brainwashed minds talking, repeating the modernized social norms, mainly derived from Abrahamic cultures, to make us feel ashamed of our humanity. 

Love and lust are both equally valid and wonderful, and one can be found powerfully in the other. Diverse pleasure is the human experience. It allows you to accept everything as it is, and people as they are, without ruining your relationships or experiences.

For starters, no lifelong love begins with love. Most of the time, no one says I love you on the first date. It all begins with a lust. The person turned you on, caught your eye, struck your interest. Maybe you even had sex on the first encounter, and that's wonderful. When you receive someone to share intimacy with, it's a gift from Aphrodite, as well as Eros, and you should enjoy it. 

I know I have certainly had such experiences in the past. I have even been with women who I only had sex with once, which means it was lustful, and yet, I still care for them even to this day. Because you share something special with the person(s), and in your mind and heart, that will always mean something. In fact, throughout my younger life, I ignored several opportunities to have that pleasure with people, and I later had to work through the regret. You'll always regret the things you don't do. Take it from someone who knows, don't pass it up. 

Within lust, one can as well find that they love something or someone. Equally, within love there can be lots of lust. I dearly love my wife, but I still have the carnal desire for all that she is, which would be called lust. I love her body, her kiss, and her touch, and also notable, the lust drives the passion that has never died for the entire 15 years we have been together.

These are all powerful and important forms of sexuality and human interaction; sometimes one even hinges on the other. Somethings are meant to turn into lifelong love, and others are meant for pleasure's sake, for the benefit of friendship and attraction, and both of these can bring equal amounts of joy, beauty and support into your life. 

Life was, is, and always will be multifaceted. An individual is not meant to be just one thing, or experience one event, throughout their entire life. The opportunity to take part in all that life has to offer is not meant to be feared. We are meant to live fully. The Gods did not give us life, and send people and things into our lives, for no reason at all. We are meant to enjoy and find pleasure in all of that, to learn and grow, and define all that is part of our lives.

That is, if you accept that both love and lust are valuable. If you abandon one another just because of the kind of attraction and connection you have, you'll always lose all the benefits of that relationship. If you are of the mind that you should resent your humanity, you must first change that mindset, and realize that your humanity is blessed, not damned.

In the Goodness of the Gods,

I'll see you at the next Herm down the road,

Chris Aldridge.

Was I The Last Man She Kissed?

In 2018, I moved to South Beloit, Illinois, and I met a girl there about my age, by the name of Michelle. I cannot recall exactly how we met, but I can surmise that we had similar interests through things like religion and philosophy, and found one another through social media. I admit that I was sexually attracted to her, but at first it was just a friendship ordeal, which I had no problem with.

The more we talked, the more we liked each other, and one day we decided to meet for lunch. It was one of those things that was a date, but also was not, if that makes sense. We were there to have fun with each other, yet there were no romantic titles or intentions. But in any case, I was delighted to just spend the day with a beautiful girl who was my friend.

The more time we spent together, however, the closer our lips got until we kissed. So it was one of those beautiful things that people write about in poems and love stories. It didn't seem like it would go any further than just an affectionate friendship at most, but nevertheless, I could only find enjoyment in her presence. But I would have never imagined in a million years that it would be the last time I'd ever see her, because she suddenly died later that year. As far as I know, she didn't have any other male friends of the romantic type, so it's possible that I was the last man she ever kissed.

In fact, her death happened so suddenly that I didn't even have time to make preparations to attend the funeral, which I still brood over to this day when I think about it. It was one of those experiences that blows you away, leaving you in shock and disbelief, sometimes even for months or years to come. Whenever I am passing through South Beloit these days, I still drive by the restaurant where we spent our last day together, and simply look at it, not as a painful memory, but as a testament to a truth that I will now explain.

I tell this story sometimes in my speeches on life and living without regrets, because every single day I see people all around me that are letting the clock tick by. They're so consumed by social norms, personal fear, or the delusion that they have plenty of time. Each day is a countdown, every second that goes by, you can never get back. I can still close my eyes and feel her kiss, and it's no longer a romantic feeling, but a wakeup call, that every day is a gift. 

The Gods gave you life for a reason, and the common sense to not waste it. One day Death will come for you. One day Charon will extend his hand for your coin, and it'll be too late. No amount of crying or pleading will turn back the clock. You're not meant to live in fear, you're not meant to micromanage life, and you don't have plenty of time; you're meant to live and live now. 

In the Goodness of the Gods,

I'll see you at the next Herm down the road,

Chris Aldridge.

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How A Hellenic Marriage Endured The Impossible

I certainly will never pass myself off as a licensed relationship counselor, but from my own relationship of the last 14 years, which was a Hellenic union and marriage, I know what creates strength and weakness, love and hate, union and dissolution.

I remember a long time ago a friend of mine, who wasn't a Hellenist or any religion as far as I knew, asked me to pray for her marriage, as it was on the verge of divorce. I said I'd ask Hera for help (Queen of heaven and the Goddess of marriage).

A few days later, my friend told me that her relationship had miraculously improved. I haven't heard from her since, and I hope things are still going well, but the first point is that when you put Hera at the center of your union, it will never break.

Of course, it was first Aphrodite, Goddess of love and passion, who brought my wife and I together. Still to this day, after the better part of 20 years of being together, we still have just as much passion for one another.

The hard part, at the beginning of our relationship, was that neither of our families approved. They either felt one wasn't good enough for the other, or that it was something that was happening too fast and hasty. But sometimes, that's the way the universe works.

So literally, we ran away together. We didn't care what others thought. She left her home, and I mine. We didn't look back either. For a short time, we were technically homeless until we managed to get into a hotel here and there, in which we stayed until our first apartment was finally secured.

When you want to be with someone and the opportunity to change your life for the better is there, don't bother yourself with the opinions of other people. Listen to what the Gods and your heart tell you. 

Some may be critical of spontaneous love, but I can verify that it is an indicator of the strongest kind. If you have to work to get someone to love you, it's just not meant to be. A natural connection does not require labor, nor can it ever be destroyed, just as energy itself cannot be.

When we rented our first apartment together in High Point, North Carolina in the summer of 2009, we were so poor that I was astounded they even gave us one in the first place, and as nice as it was to add. We literally had nothing but our laptops, clothes to sit on, and an air mattress for sleep. 

But we were as happy as we could be, even though we didn't have any material. We didn't even have good jobs at the time. Nevertheless, we were delighted just to be with each other in our own place, away from everything and everyone else. Therefore, I'd say the second phase is finding someone who is willing to run away with and love you for you only.

Of course, finding someone who only wants you for you may not be that easy if you're rich or well off. In that case, I really can't give advice because I've never been rich. But what I can say is that someone who wants you when you're poor, won't leave you when you're rich. So if you want a lifelong partner, get one either when you're poor, or who doesn't know you're not.

However, we could not have possibly guessed what was to come next, something that would change so many lives, including ours, forever; a severely premature baby. Even though Gryphon pulled through amazingly after being born at only 24 weeks, he still has issues he will have to work through throughout his life.

Why does this have such an impact on the marriage between my wife and I? Because over 80% of marriages with children with disabilities end in divorce or separation. Ours never did. That's not to say it hasn't had its difficult times, but the hardships uniquely made us stronger together.

When Gods like Zeus, Athena, Artemis and Apollon are part of your life, you realize that you have a duty and an obligation to others, no matter how difficult things may become at times. It was mine to love my wife and be there for my son, because I had assisted in bringing this union together and creating our child. My personal feelings and stresses are irrelevant when it comes to duty.

In short, Hellenism instills in you honor. Honor is the most important of all virtues, because without it, there is nothing you won't do under the right circumstances. Honor puts the personal to the side and brings to the top what is simply right and what is simply wrong. Would it have been much easier to leave my marriage? Quite possibly. But easy isn't always right, nor does it always make you better.

Additionally, the more you experience hardships and trials together, the more love and strength your connection will have. Don't run or recoil from challenges if they come. Instead invoke the Gods, take each other's hand, and push through them. Whatever you do, never see one another as the enemy or the reason for your troubles. You are in it together. Your partnership is supposed to help you manage things better. Use it.

Life is not easy. It's a full time job, full of stress, health and financial issues, and sometimes even legal concerns. But I tell you truly, the Gods and your love will bring you through all of it.

One might say, "Yes, but why bother? If it's been that hard a significant amount of the time, wouldn't it be better to just not go through it?"

The answer is, if you never want to change for the better and you don't want to get the most out of a relationship, then no, it's not worth your time. Otherwise, it's worth every step. You'll notice progress for the better, just as we have. Things have always improved slowly but surely. We are a world better off now than when we first met. It's not even a close comparison. For two reasons; the Gods and the refusal to give up.

In the Goodness of the Gods,

I'll see you at the next Herm down the road,

Chris Aldridge.

How I Know The Gods Love Humanity

When a Hellenist speaks of the love of the Gods, they may not intend it to be in the way mainstream religions think. Of course, I cannot speak for all Hellenists, but as for myself, when I say that the Gods love us, I largely mean that they are fascinated by humans, and in turn, this does create a certain level of affection. They are everywhere in our world, and with us constantly, sometimes whether we invite them or not. In my personal experience, the Gods have shown an affinity for my own family and I. I have talked about these cases many times, from the conversion to Hellenism that happened to my wife and I, to the recovery of our premature child and various other blessings the Gods have given us along the long and hard road called life. Additionally, I've also had the privilege and honor of seeing the Gods and Heroes brighten the lives of the friends and people around me.

But the question remains in the title of this post, how do I know the Gods love humanity? Simple, because they don't have to. The universe is so huge that it's beyond human comprehension. There are places and things out there far more beautiful and far more fascinating than we are, and yet the Gods still choose to be part of ours. Chances are, there is a world out there that puts Illinois to shame, and a lifeform that makes me look unevolved, but if I ask Hermes to accompany me on my travels today, there's a conceivable chance He will. The human being, and the world in which we live, hold a place in the hearts of Gods. I know the Gods love us because there are greater things they could focus their time on, but they choose to spend some of it with us.

And why is that? What is it about us that draws so much attention from the heavens, the Earth, and the Underworld? We humans in general, especially today, may not think much of ourselves. Sometimes we can get so used to something that we take it for granted or end up conceiving it to be dull. But the fact of the matter is that we have become extraordinary beings. For starters, we are the most intelligent and evolved mortal lifeform on Earth, and we can accomplish things that none of the others can. We can build magnificent temples and skyscrapers, travel to other planets, make amazing foods and medicines, produce mansions, machines, and breathtaking art, and even prolong our own lives as time goes on. The Gods love us because there are no others like us here. We make Earth glimmer in the solar system. 

So the next time you're depressed or thinking lowly of yourself, just remember, you're amazing enough that Gods are interested in you.

In The Goodness of the Gods,

I'll see you at the next Herm down the road,

Chris Aldridge.

I Knew She Was Real That Day

I hadn't had much luck with women by that point in my life, either because they didn't like me or I was too stupid in my youth to recognize the signals (and we can only thank the oppressive social norms of modern society for that). By 2005, I had only been with two women in my life, and one I didn't even sleep with. One might could say it wasn't even an actual relationship because she was not loyal to me at all, in any way. But by that year, a change had also entered my life. I first discovered the Greek Gods as a religion. I did not know all of the Gods or even how to practice Hellenism, but I knew of and felt connections with the Olympians. Aphrodite was one of my closest (and still is).

While I hadn't had a successful romantic life, I knew Aphrodite was the Goddess not only of love but sex and beauty, and it was for the latter two attributes that I decided to pray to Her. My request was simple: make me more attractive to the opposite sex. Each time I prayed for that, I would notice women looking at me more when I was out in public. Aphrodite possibly enhanced my beauty, or perhaps I was beautiful all along and the Goddess helped people notice me more. After my connection with Aphrodite, my romantic and sexual encounters only became more frequent. In 2009, I met the love of my life who would become my wife (I am still married to her to this day). From the first day She blessed me, I knew Aphrodite was real.

Valentine's Day, the day of love, makes me think back onto those early days when the Greek Gods first showed their wonderful selves to me. I don't think Aphrodite cared that I wasn't actually a Hellenist at that time. I was Hellenic in my heart, and She cultivated that into the pious man I am today.

In the Goodness of Aphrodite,

Chris Aldridge.

The Gods Give Us Emotion To Make Us Moral

An epiphany was what my wife and I called it last night, during our discussion on the Gods, nature, and emotion. Many times, we humans tend to think of our emotional side as a weakness, as we are the most emotional of all other beings on the planet. It's true that we can sometimes be irrational, but the benefits of our emotional state far outweigh the debts. In the grand picture of things, it's hardly a weakness, but a necessary virtue. Being the most powerful and smartest mortal creatures on the planet, things would be much, much worse if we didn't have emotion. It also allows the Gods to appeal to our moral, ethical and compassionate side far more than if we didn't have it.

Let's start with an example from my own life, so that the reader may better understand this universal truth. I have a very cute cat named Rosie, who we adopted from a local animal shelter a year or so ago. She is a valuable asset to our family at times, but she also has her many problems. The trouble she gets into will sometimes make me incredibly angry to the point that I want to get rid of her, but here's the thing, I can't. No matter how much I want to pick her up and toss her out my door, my emotions create empathy and love, and make me realize that such an action is not only cruel, but very wrong and dishonorable. More so, the Gods are able to appeal that ethical side to me because of the fact that they enabled me with the emotional capacity for empathy and compassion. If I had no emotion, I could do whatever I wanted to other living creatures and indeed the world around me. No matter what the Gods or humans told me, I would be unable to feel or understand it, and that would be a recipe for disaster.

The same goes for other people. The reason we don't abandon our children, spouses or loved ones is because our emotional states will not allow it. Our ability to love and feel keeps us moral and honorable. If we didn't have that capacity, our species would de-evolve into extinction. The Gods gave it to us because it was necessary for our survival and the prosperity of everything around us. And if we encounter someone who fails to show emotion, such as a sociopath, we consider them to be mentally ill, not a natural production.

Realizing this about ourselves is crucial to beginning to understand the genius of the Gods and the intelligence behind our natural existence.

In the Goodness of the Gods,
Chris Aldridge.

Aphrodite ~ Her Real Character

Even as far back as ancient Greece, there were people who feared the power of Aphrodite. Of course, that's a bit misleading because the Greeks feared the powers of all Gods, not just Her. To act as though Aphrodite was the only One who sometimes caused men to cower is simply untrue. All of the Gods were both loved and feared. But love and sex were, and still are, extremely powerful forces, and when something takes possession of us, even if it's part of our natural state, we can sometimes find ourselves afraid and therefore think of it as terrible or mischievous. However, in reality, Aphrodite is not a Goddess who does bad things, no God is. She was worshiped and celebrated all over the ancient Greek world. Even though Her dominant epithets may have slightly differed from region to region, She was still the same Goddess. For example, to some, Her sphere of sexuality may have been more geared toward marital unions, while others viewed Her as present in sexual activity in general. There can be no doubt that Her realm gives life to us all. Without sexual union, humans would go extinct. We don't often think about it, especially if we have achieved great success in life, but the basic intercourse of sexuality is the reason we are even here in the first place, and therefore it's something to love and celebrate. 

Although, despite the fact that She was so widely loved and served by so many, modern authors of ancient Greek history, at times, take the liberty to portray Her as a force that the Greeks resented and preferably wanted nothing to do with, one that was dreaded most of all. But as Socrates said in the Dialogue of Theaetetus, it is not possible for a God to wish for wickedness upon mankind. It's also important to remember that there was no dogmatic belief system in ancient Athens. The Greeks were more so concerned with practice, instead of the personal beliefs of each person. Therefore, what one Athenian believed about a God, could be different than what another believes about them. Just because they write those beliefs down, no matter how famous the author, doesn't necessarily mean there's a universal consensus. In fact, it's probably a safe bet that we have lost most of the things that were written down in ancient Greece.

The ancient Greeks were certainly people who were far more sexually free and accepting of the wonderful things about sexuality than the later Christians who took over the West, and although places like ancient Athens in the Classical Period are routinely portrayed as sexist and fearful of the female, their religious devotion does not seem to coincide with that image. After all, the men dedicated the City to a Goddess (Athena), and did so in place of a male God (Poseidon). On the Acropolis, the holiest of holy places for Athens, which was a City dominated by men, there stood a shrine to Aphrodite and Her son Eros, the God of love. One of the most well known festivals held in Her honor in Athens was called Aphrodisia, and is the first festival of the Athenian new year. Her most famously known devotee from ancient times is Sappho, another female, who was elevated to the rank of the 10th Muse. And Aphrodite Herself was known to the Athenians as Heavenly, Averter of Unlawful Desire, and Common to All People.

In the book Greek Religion by Walter Burkert, the section on Aphrodite is very clear on Her purpose and Divinity.

"Aphrodite's sphere of activity is immediately and sensibly apparent; the joyous consummation of sexuality" (Burkert, 152).

Notice he says, "joyous," not fearful or resentful. There was a time in human history when sex was a way to connect with the Divine, instead of something to be thought of as lowly, impure, or sinful. It didn't keep us from Deity, it brought them to us. And it sometimes seems that the more and more ancient culture and philosophy progressed, the more the Gods were viewed and understood as Bringers of good things, and not Beings to make you fear your humanity or the world. As it was said, I believe by the philosopher Sallustius, The Gods are always good, and never harmful. We would therefore be led to believe that something which is the contrary has not been sent by the Gods.

This progression in theology, and the various ways to connect with the Gods was, of course, interrupted by the Christian take over, and early Christians sometimes used their own interpretation to revise ancient perceptions and beliefs, and when they did this, it was not a flattering view. If there was one thing they hated more than the Pagans, it was sexual freedom exercised by a woman, and Aphrodite, being a sexually strong and independent female Divinity, would have no doubt gotten the worst end of male dominated, Christian supremacist wrath.

Of course, it would be highly dishonest to act as though all ancient Greek men were trusting of women. It would also be dishonest to suggest that every Greek culture was sexually identical, when women in Sparta held more power than women in Athens. And there has never been, in the world's history, a society of matriarchy, and no one's denying that. But I think that, as human beings, no matter our gender, we sometimes fear those of the opposite. Men have feared women because they worry about seduction, temptation, or manipulation, and women have feared men because they worry about misogyny in its many forms. This has sometimes led us to demonize one another, but I think that if we come to terms with the fact that male and female are both blessed beings, we will lose the grip of fear and distrust on our minds.

In the Goodness of the Gods,

Chris Aldridge.

Work Cited: Burkert, Walter, Greek Religion, Harvard University Press, Cambridge, Massachusetts. 1985.

Affirmations of Happiness

So many people are looking to find happier lives, or ways to live happier. If you are friends with me on facebook, I recently released a video where I talk about my own former struggles and how I came to find happiness in life. There are many ways to achieve this. As I said in the video, some people may need medication and therapy to get better of mental disorders like I did, but I have also found that generating a consistently positive attitude toward the world and your own life can greatly increase one's happiness, and one good way to do this is by reciting daily affirmations, which could be better-suited for morning religious or spiritual practices. Although it may seem small, you would be surprised what a world of difference it can make in your day when you are determined to have a positive and happy attitude about things, and you can do this, in part, by reciting daily affirmations, which are basically declarations to yourself.

Each morning before you start your day, try reciting the following affirmations aloud. As I said earlier, it's probably best done in a religious or spiritual setting, but as long as you can speak, you can do them in any case so long as you are serious about it.

I am grateful for another day of life, 

and all good and beautiful things in it,

paying no attention to anything bad.

I (state your name) hereby and forever shun all evil and negativity,

and I will only focus on that which is good and positive,

for I am loved by the Gods who also love good.

In so many ways, the only route to being happy is to realize what these affirmations state. Basically, a negative and evil life is not worth living. The good news is that it's a choice to live by it. You can just as easily choose to be positive and focus on the good. By being grateful and deciding to shun all things negative and evil, you are choosing to turn away from and avoid everything that makes you sad, angry, depressed and/or generally upset, and instead you are dedicated to looking at the good in life only. Not only can it make you happier, it can keep bad things from happening to you. Before I began medication and started looking at life better, I was consistently negative about almost everything, and bad luck was a constant companion of mine. My new car was banged up twice, and things generally produced negative results for me. However, once I started living a positive life, misfortune became far less common. Why? Because believe me when I say, like attracts like.

In our time when negativity and depression is a household item, you have to be a warrior for peace and happiness in your own life. Otherwise, the opposite will eventually overtake you. You must always guard your borders.

In the Goodness of the Gods,
Chris.