Thursday, May 9, 2019

You Had Me At "Let's Go To Subway"

Ten years ago yesterday, my wife and I went on our first date. We sometimes joke, You had me at let's go to subway, since that's where I took her, a small place just up the hill, as I put it, from my house. This particular establishment had a drive thru, which made ordering a bit difficult as Anastasia leaned over me because we couldn't keep our hands or our lips off each other. We became inseparable and later married in 2011, one year after having our first child. But it's not been an easy road at all. From having a disabled child to moving across the country and dealing with some of the hardest problems a relationship can face, I dare say that nearly 100% of couples in our situation would have split long ago. But we did not. No matter how hard or hopeless things got, and no matter how long it lasted, nothing has ever been able to break us. Now I don't want to make it sound like we've always had it hard either. We've also had very good and fun times together, but there is certainly something to be said about our ability to face the tough side of life. Statistically speaking, just having a disabled child alone is enough to break up many couples, not including any other problems or hardships the relationship may be having.

When I first met Anastasia, we lived nearly a thousand miles apart. She was in Chicago and I resided in Thomasville, North Carolina. I had other girls trying for me during that time, but one thing that drew me to Anastasia was the fact that she was willing to travel so far, and so often, to be with me even for the shortest amount of time. I had never found greater dedication to me from any other woman in my life. I decided that if I wanted a long term relationship, this was the opened door, and our first year together in our first apartment was an amazing time of new experiences for us. It even brought us both into the same religion. In fact, we have been kept together by our love and devotion to the Gods, always trusting in them to get us through anything, and also of course by our great passion for one another and devotion to our family.

A long lasting relationship, I think, is born of 3 things. Faith, whether it be in the Gods and/or in yourselves. Devotion, as in undying dedication to your partner. No matter what happens, or doesn't happen, you don't give up on each other. In order to have a relationship that never ends, you have to have strength that never relents. And third, passion between both of you, because a physical and mental passion never ever dies, if it's genuine. You can't quite explain it in words, but there's just something about the person that makes you want to kiss them all over. Even after ten years, I am still obsessed with my wife. She still makes me weak in the knees, and equally important, the feeling is mutual. Unfortunately, the third element is not something you can create. There's either passion and chemistry, or there's not. But once you do find it, you can count on forever if you add the other elements of the relationship. Without question, I know my wife and I will spend the rest of our lives together.

In the Goodness of the Gods,
Chris.